Tuesday 4.16.13:
What do I want in life?
What path am I walking at this very moment?
What do I want to do with this information?
When I first started out reading Tarot, being a Mystic, and learning about energy, I had this great expectation that I would have my own business, aiding others on their spiritual journey. Then I was introduced to reality. The great curtain of Illusion. That which Ego lives in, advising me that I did not have certification, a paper with little letters stating that I was someone. I thought that I was not worthy of knowing, of understanding, of being perfect. There are great Tarot Readers that went back to school later in life, but took that leap of Faith into the unknown. They let Source lead them to their dream job. Many advise that you start out with a struggle. That you have to give a lot in order to move a small amount of space forward.
Some Tarot readers did nothing but rely on their gift. Others read many books and took many classes, blessed with the abundance to pay for teachers. Then there are those who simply give up using their gift, because they think that they can not do it, without payed guidance.
I use to think that I could not read Tarot unless someone advised me what each card meaning meant, what position it was to sit in, and how much to charge clients. I did not have Faith in myself as a reader, and also I was not practicing as much. Now I find myself in a new field of expertise. I have learned how to read the cards, trust my intuition, and use energy work with my readings. I now read books for new inspiration, rather than to learn the basics. I find myself wanting to write a book myself, not on Tarot, but how to recognize your signposts in life and use them to your advantage.
There are a lot of classes out there for a young Tarot person to take advantage of. You can learn so much in such little time, but the great question is "What will you do with the information?"
I know that I am a healer. That my ability to take unwanted energy and transform it to useful energy is a wonderful gift, but I lack guidance. I think that I lack the certificate or paper that states "I am". I returned to school to see if I was ready to complete my education, but found that online classes are not the route for me. At least I tried to experience, rather than dismiss. Now I know that I need to be in a class setting. I also know that if I want to become a healer, then I have to start acting like one. If I want to be a full time Tarot reader, then I have to start acting like a full time Tarot reader. I know that I must pick wisely with information that I receive. Information that I spend my money on. This is my education. I am paying for it, so it better be awesome and well worth my time and effort. I found that they try to make you conform to their teaching methods and pay them for something they want, rather than what you want out of a school. They rely on customer attendance. They rely on a student completing their education. If something is not working, then they have to change.
My life is, my life. No one else can live it. No one else can state to me "No". I move in the direction I wish to move in. No one can tell me to stop. To not exist.
I write because I think I have to. That if I do not, then I do not exist as a Tarot Reader or Spiritual person. My Ego will state that this Blog is a chore. That this job is not worth your time. That you have to keep doing it, or you will not exist as a person, or as a spiritual being. My Ego states that you must go back to school and get any old degree, so that you can call yourself smart. That is not the case. I am always evolving, always reading, always trying to improve my status as a person.
I guess I am writing this so that others out there who are not doing what they want to do, can read this, and state "I will do what makes me happy" rather than "I am doing this because I have to".
The change can be small. It can start with one step, then another, and then one more. You may stay in one spot for a while, but eventually your spirit will direct you to move, or will push you to take a step in any direction.
Education is the process of learning something new, evolving into something wonderful, and understanding when to apply the information. A certificate is required to state that you understand, but there are those who do not need the certificate to advise that they understand. It is reflected in the production of their work. They are great people and the certificate would only be a plus. The classes would be of interest, rather than requirement.
I am not stating that someone should not return to school. Frankly, I know I will be returning to school in the near future, but for now I am wanting to understand what my next step is, regarding my gift and talent to read Tarot Cards and to aid others on their spiritual journey.
The card is Six of Coins. Generosity. I give, I get. I give with no expectations, I receive with no limitations.
One has to spread the love, spread the money, spread the abundance with others, in order to keep the flow of energy going. If you put it in bottles high on a shelf and state "it is safe for now" then it will never multiply. If you were to look at a beautiful seed and state "There is only one, so I better hold onto it and wait for the right time to plant this little seed". It may have cost you a fortune, but you have to plant it, in order to receive fruit. Whether it lives or dies depends on you. How much attention will you give it? How well will you tend to that seed? What if it does not produce fruit?
People are scared that it will die. That, during the process, a force of nature will destroy the crop.
Have it whither and die.
Then the seed will die, so what!.
The dream is not over. You must plant another, and another, and another seed until fruit is given. You must plant more than one seed in order to be supplied with a healthy crop. You must share. You must plant a different seed. Maybe you were meant to plant lemons, and instead you were trying to grow apples. Source must let us choose in order to understand. There is a plan. Growing apples may not be part of your talent now, but maybe you have to grow something simple, that can die and be replanted with little effort, so that you can learn from the mistakes made with an easy seed, rather than one that is delicate. Eventually you will be a master at growing lemons and move on to apples. The dream is never dead. You must give, in order to receive. Production is part of the process. Your life must be lived. You must experience, in order to know. Now experience. Give, Give, Give! Know that more is there. More is waiting for you. There is always more than enough.
Blessed Be.
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